The Golden GIRLS

The Golden GIRLS


♪ AND IF YOU THREW A PARTY INVITED EVERYONE YOU KNEW NOOCHLT ♪ YOU WOULD SEE THE BIGGEST GIFT WOULD BE FROM ME ♪ ♪ AND THE CARD ATTACHED WOULD SAY THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪ ♪ ♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>I BELIEVE I PURCHASED EVERYTHING.>>THIS IS ALL JUST CIGARETTES. WHERE’S EVERYTHING ON THE LIST I GAVE YOU?>>I NODDED OUT IN THE DAIRY AISLE.>>I STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND LIKE WHY YOU THINK IT’S OKAY TO BE ON RECREATIONAL MORPHINE. [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME THAT YOU GUYS ARE THROWING ME THIS 63rd BIRTHDAY/DIVORCE/KNEE SURGERY PARTY.>>YOU’RE 77 YEARS OLD. YOU’VE BEEN MARRIED EIGHT TYPES AND YOU’RE HAVING KNEE SURGERY IN AND AROUND YOUR FACE. [ LAUGHTER ]>>LET’S GET THIS PARTY STARTED! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] OKAY, QUHR WE GOING TO WRAP THIS UP? I NEED TO BE IN BED BY 5:00. BY 5:30 I’M GOING TO BE DREAMING OF TOM HARDY LICKING PUDDING OFF HIS DENTURES.>>IT’S 5:00 NOW.>>THEN TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT.>>GET BACK HERE.>>CAN I JUST SAY? I LOVE BEING ABLE TO CELEBRATE WITH ALL OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS. AND JESSA. WHICH DRESS DO YOU LIKE BETTER?>>DEFINITELY THE SLEEVELESS, IT’S SO MODERN YET CLASSIC.>>SHE CAN’T WEAR THE SLEEVELESS, THE SKIN IN HER PITS IS DRAGGING LABIA BEFORE IT DISCOVERED COCONUT OIL, WHICH BY THE WAY REALLY DOES DO EVERYTHING.>>THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO AN SECRET. I AM COMPLETELY HUMILIATED. YOU MAY HAVE FINALLY DONE IT, YOUNG LADY.>>OKAY, COME ON, GIVE IT UP, YOU SLAG.>>OH, ALL RIGHT. OKAY. YOU GUYS KNOW ARNAZ?>>OH, YEAH, HE’S THAT SOME-HIP 90-YEAR-OLD THAT PLAYS EXPERIMENTAL MANDOLIN ON BINGO NIGHT.>>WE WERE WORKING ON MUSIC LAST NIGHT AND — WE HIT IT.>>HIT IT? THAT IS SOMETHING — AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?>>YOU’RE DAFT, THAT’S WHEN A MAN MAKES LOVE TO YOUR ARMPITS.>>EWW!>>IT’S A BURGEONING TREND IN SENIOR LIVING, I WROTE A PIECE FOR THE NEWSLETTER WORD IS HERPES IN THE TENNIS CLUB WAS LITERALLY FIERY.>>IT’S AMAZING YOU HAD A TEST CASE RIGHT HERE IN THE HOUSE.>>IT IS NOT MY FAULT. HE TOLD ME IT WAS BEDSORES. WHO WAS I TO OBJECT?>>IT’S OKAY, HONEY. FRANKLY I’M SURPRISED IT TOOK YOU TO LONG TO GET IT. HERPES SO IS BAKE.>>WE ALL GOT IT, FRONT AND BACK. [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>YOU KNOW WHAT? I’M JUST GOING TO WEAR THE DAMN SLEEVELESS DRESS. ESPECIALLY IF IT’S JUST THE FOUR OF US.>>ACTUALLY, THERE IS ONE MORE PERSON COMING. OH, THAT’S THE STRIPPER.>>STRIPPER? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE JOKING.>>THEY PREFER TO BE CALLED SENSUALITY ARTISTS. STRIPPER IS NOT A VERY –>>DOOR’S OPEN!>>HANNAH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?>>WHAT, I GOT OF UTI, WET DIAPER, I’M AIRING IT OUT.>>CAN YOU DO THAT SOMEWHERE NECESSARILY.>>EXCUSE ME FOR LIVING OUT LOUD.>>HELLO, LADIES. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] SAUSAGES HERE AND YOU’RE ALL UNDER — MOM?>>HAMPTON?>>MOM, WHEN I’M WORKING IT’S OFFICER SAUSAGE.>>OH, YEAH, HE TOTALLY HAS YOUR BUTT.>>HAS EVERYONE FULLY FORGOTTEN IT’S MY BIRTHDAY? HELLO, HANDSOME.>>HI.>>WELL. I’M GOING TO EAT THIS WHOLE CHEESECAKE IN HOPES I FALL INTO A DIABETIC COMA SO I CAN FORGET MY SON JUST CAME OVER TO SHOW ME HIS MEMBER. CHEESECAKE, TAKE THE WHEEL.>>HEY, FLAT DUMPSTERS. I’VE GOT ENSURE AND ECSTASY, WHO WANTS TO PARTY TILL WE CRAP OURSELVES?>>I’M NOT FALLING FOR THAT AGAIN.>>OFFICER SAUSAGE?>>IS NOBODY ELSE BOTHERED BY THE FACT THAT ELIJAH HASN’T AGED EVEN A LITTLE?>>I TOLD YOU BITCHES, IT’S I’LL OF OLAY AND BOXED WINE, DID ANY OF YOU EVEN TRY IT?>>LISTEN. I PAID FOR A STRIPPER TO CHOP CHOP AT THE DANCE, SONNY.>>I’LL TOSS IN AN EXTRA 100 FOR THE ARMPIT STUFF.>>I CAN’T. I CAN’T. I’VE FALLEN. LIFE ALERT?>>YEAH!>>I’VE FALLEN, I’M COMPLETELY OVERWHELMED, IF SOMEONE COULD MAKE CONTACT WITH MY PARENTS? ♪ ♪>>80 IS THE BEST! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>Jimmy: THANK YOU, LENA. LENA DUNHAM, EVERYONE. THE BEST. WATCH THE FINAL EPISODE OF

100 Comments

  1. As Golden girls #1 Gram, this was complete BULLSHIT and disrespect to my favorite show. The Golden girls were nothing like this

  2. wow. Blue Ivy Carter directed this? wow just wow.

    (edit: i know this is a joke)

  3. Oh please! This version is horrific AF and I'd rather see

    Ty Wood as Dorothy
    Colin Ford as Rose
    Zachary Gordon as Blanche
    Justin Prentice as Sophia

  4. God, I loathe this type of modern female american accent, what is with the VOCAL FRY? It doesn't make you more intelligent to sound like a crack addict.

  5. Who tf are these dry ass actors? They destroyed a TV classic. This skit didn't do any justice at all. Take it down!!!

  6. I'm sorry but this is so lame….This is nothing like the classic amazing original show! I can't even watch the whole the thing!

  7. I’m sorry. Jimmy you know I love you but you and your writers REALLY MISSED THE MARK ON THIS ONE. Forget the fact that this wasn’t even funny. It had very little to even do with the actual Golden Girls Sitcom. Whoever wrote this out put zero thought and effort into it. Dare I say it was cringeworthy. Now that being said…

    Picture it…. 2018, a beautiful young Peasant Girl spitting out the sides of a Heavenly Cloud with Blanch and Dorothy, disgusted at Jimmy Kimmel and his writers for being a bigger disappointment than the AMC Pacer!

  8. THIS IS HILARIOUS on its own!!!! stop literally comparing it to the Golden Girls. if you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all.

  9. At 30 seconds I'm done watching. GG was and is my favorite sitcom of all time. Someone report this trash. 🤣

  10. A lame disgrace to the memory of the deceased Golden Girls and to my beloved Betty White.

    I could barely even tell which "actress" was supposed to be what character.

    Unsubscribing from kimmel

  11. Y'all are so soft. Get out your feelings. It's wasn't supposed to be a tribute to the Golden Girls. Read the description.

  12. I’m done before making it half way through. This should be in the same burning dumpster with the person wrote this trash!!! It’s probably wrong for me to feel so strongly, but wtf?

  13. There's nothing wrong with taking jokes and doing reenactment but seriously wtf is this ??? Worst of all shows . Some drag queens always do the golden girls tribute reenactment and they do way better than this show .

  14. Ummm why did they make the GG's look so busted? They were super dope older women who showed us that aging does not have to mean undesirable……but this??????

  15. Any one of the GG actors has more talent in one pinky than all these people combined. Remind me of high school druggies. Just flat characters. 🙄 How does Jimmy Kimmel, or anyone, think this is funny? Where was I? Oh yes, back to Stephen Colbert.

  16. I just watched this crap and none of this is funny at all. I rather watch teletubbies instead. That's how stupid this is and very disgusting and disrespectful too.

  17. Meh, people are overreacting so much to this. I guess girls are also the main audience for this, easy to see that in the comments. Pfft.

  18. I feel insulted,I can't believe they did this! They will never be as good as the REAL golden girls!!! Arm I right?

  19. I was afraid to say how I felt about this, but after reading the comments…

    This is the least funny thing I’ve ever seen. I never laughed once. And since they’re comparing it to the original Golden Girls, just adds insult to injury.

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